If you're young and uncertain, please read.

[Kiel]

Even if you hate reading my posts for whatever reason, please, read this one.

I say these words without the slightest hint of humour, because it's no laughing matter.

On January 22nd, I turned 18.

Tonight, I suddenly realized how little I had accomplished in life towards my future.

I have a vague idea of what I want in terms of a career, I won't graduate high school until next year (I need another two university level credits), I don't have a job or a drivers liscence and have made no attempt to research more than one post secondary school.

Needless to say, at this point in time, looking back on my years in highschool and my achievements...

...I feel a little helpless and uncertain.

I also realise that I'm not alone or special in any way. Hundreds, thousands, even millions of young adults feel the uncertainty of their futures and begin to panic, helplessness, and dispare.

This is important

If you feel this way, you are not alone.

The people (even friends) who seem to know exactly what they're doing with their lives (the people you feel inadequeate to) aren't much better off. They feel the same way you do, if not now, then they already have or will in the future.

These feelings are NORMAL

Everyone has them. Even people you would never expect to have them do.

Most importantly:

Don't Panic
Don't Panic
Don't Panic

Everything will be alright.

I'm not trying to tell you to suck it up or anything. That would be mean, and that's not the kind of person i am.

I am telling you, however, that if you want these feelings to go away, you do need to start moving and changing.

Not drastically, but gradually.

Take those baby steps to sort your life out. The worst thing that you can do is to live under the guise that you'll be fine no matter what.

Try.

Try to achieve in things you think are difficult or impossible.

Don't do it for anyone other than yourself.

Do it for you.

Please, do it for you.







I'm sorry for basically posting an overly emotional rant on the boards. Kaori, this can be deleted if you see fit. I just had a bit of a breakdown and wanted to give some advice.

It's my gift, no...my plea to anyone having difficulty in life.

[Tensei Kaori]

Kiel, I know exactly how you feel. Just a few short months ago, I was in that same place in my life. I originally chose to go to the community college I attend now because: 1) I was already enrolled here (dual credit), and 2) I hadn't done enough research on any school I could actually afford to go to. Even in college and taking classes, I had absolutely no idea what I was doing or what I would do. I didn't get my driver's license until a few weeks before starting my first semester - talk about pressure, I practically had a breakdown over worrying about what'd happen if I failed. So much that I had to stop myself from crying when I actually got the thing.

But slowly, things started changing. I got involved in church, I started helping out with rides and such whenever I could. I began doing more things on my own, and gained independence - and confidence - with it. By taking different classes, I'm beginning to have a few ideas about what I want to do with the rest of my life.

So this is my advice to you, from someone who's been there (and in a way, still is): Give it to God, stay away from the big picture, and take things one baby step at a time. Take the time to enjoy the way: you have the right to feel good about the steps you accomplish, no matter how small they are - I celebrated all day the first time I sang alone in voice class without shaking, dumb as that may sound - and you'll begin feeling better about your potential when you acknowledge the things you can do here and now. It won't be instantaneous, and it won't be easy.

But it works for me.

And remember, if any of you need anyone to talk/vent/angst to, you can always come to me. I don't have all the answers, but if you need someone, I'm here.

[Kiri]

I know what you guys mean. I've been in bad shape for the past year and a half. I didn't exactly have my life planned out perfectly before moving, but I knew pretty well what I was doing as far as after graduation. When we moved here, I was in about the same place as K-chan as far as getting a license. I had only been driving about a month and then I had to take the driving exam. I nearly had a nervous breakdown and had to take it twice. I only passed because my driving instructor felt sorry for me and knew the pressure I was under.

After moving here... I don't know. The people who talked to me then know how I was feeling. I was in this slump that I don't know if I've ever really gotten out of. A lot of times it feels like everything I do is meaningless, like my life is going nowhere, and that nothing I plan on doing is going to help it.

My parents want me to go to college, and I know college is important. Supposedly I'm smart enough to attend college, but I don't see the point. All this time I've thought that my future lay in making comics, but I've even begun to doubt that. Maybe college would help solidify my career choice, but I don't know.

I feel like I'm trapped somewhere watching everything happen and I can't do anything. Everyone's lives are going on around me and mine is stuck. It all feels... really hopeless.

I don't know. I'm getting a car soon. Maybe I can use that to start to feel more independent, like K-chan. I want to get a job and work towards... something. I don't know what.

I'm going to be 19 in four months.

I feel like a waste.

Sorry for the angst-fest.....

[Kiel]

While you may feel this way Kiri, and your feelings are totally valid and understandable (never forget that), you aren't a waste.

It seems all of us around the same age are making our shaky transitions into adulthood. This is never an easy thing to do, nor has it ever been (or ever will be)

My only advice is not to panic, take deep breaths, and never forget that you are not alone with these feelings.

And, um...take some time to feel better about yourself.